Donations are optional, but awesome.

Moar Kristy

There exists a real dog, much like a toy poodle I was given as a baby, but with my face. Maybe I've been contemplating stuff like facial doppelgängers and potential split-versions-of-self kinds of things too much, but it's stuff like this that makes the internet & real life very interesting to live through.


KRISTY IS:


- A 1988 addition to the Canadian population
- The unsuccessful author of 6-or-so ebooks
- Known mostly for her evil cackle and offbeat presence
- Spends much time sitting around, doodling & writing in journals
- Dabbles in hobbies such as yarnwork, papercraft, sewing & languages


MUSIC:


Rock, instrumental, 80s, 90s, 70s, 50s, foreign, random. ザ・ブルーハーツ, 10 rue de la Madeleine, Alien Ant Farm, ABBA, Adele, Atmosphere, BNL, Blind Melon, Battles, Billy Joel, Boston, Coheed & Cambria, Eagles of Death Metal, ELO, Eminem, Foo Fighters, Genesis, Nirvana, Goo Goo Dolls, Jethro Tull, Jim Croce, Journey, movie soundtracks, Kimya Dawson, Led Zeppelin, Michael Jackson, Manic Street Preachers, Matchbox 20, Matthew Good (Band), Meat Loaf, Milla, Mme Corpse, Mohammed Rafi, Moist, Muse, Oceanship, OLP, Ozzy Osbourne, Pink Floyd, Psychostick, Rammstein, Rush, Sarah Slean, Neko Case, Tegan & Sara, Supertramp, The Cliks, The Mountain Goats, The Offspring, Weird Al.

MOVIES:


Brazil, 12 Monkeys, Man on the Moon, Donnie Darko, Gran Torino, Ghost in the Shell, Blood: the Last Vampire (2000), Hot Fuzz, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind; See No Evil, Hear No Evil; A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984), Peggy Sue Got Married, The Labyrinth, The Faculty, Kevin Smith stuff; stand-up comedy.

BOOKS:


  •  Books pertaining to the Leopold & Loeb case
  •  Psychohistorical Crisis - Donald Kingsbury
  •  Casebook of the Black Widowers - Issac Asimov
  •  Murder on the Orient Express/Curtains/10 Little Indians - Agatha Christie
  •  The Bachman Books Omnibus - Stephen King
  •  Everything's Eventual - Stephen King
  • Transmetropolitan
  • The Walking Dead
  • No Harm Undone - Hitchcock, et al
  • The Trigan Empire (Hamyln edition)
  • Oryx and Crake - Margaret Atwood
  • Bill Hicks: Agent of Evolution - Booth, et al
TV:


SEL (シリアルエクスペリメンツレイン), Ergo Proxy (エルゴプラクシー), Trigun (トライガン), Daria, Cybersix, Venture Bros, Babylon 5, Firefly, Dead Like Me, MST3K, Boston Legal, Law & Order, IR: Cold Case Files, Exhibit A, Johnny Bravo, La Femme Nikita, Beavis & Butthead, Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad, Life Without People, Dark Angel, Deadwood, Home Movies, True Blood, The Walking Dead, Golden Girls, The Newsroom, The Simpsons

QUOTES BILL FOUND ONLINE & SHIT:

"By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth." - George Carlin
"It’s like your batteries get low, and you need to charge them on someone else’s story." - Margaret Cho
"We are our own facilitators of our own creative evolutions." -- Bill Hicks

 "We have developed speed but we have shut ourselves in: machinery that gives abundance has left us in want. Our knowledge has made us cynical, our cleverness hard and unkind. We think too much and feel too little: More than machinery we need humanity; More than cleverness we need kindness and gentleness. " ... "Don't give yourselves to these unnatural men, machine men, with machine minds and machine hearts. You are not machines. You are not cattle. You are men. You have the love of humanity in your hearts. You don't hate, only the unloved hate. Only the unloved and the unnatural. Soldiers: don't fight for slavery, fight for liberty." -- The Great Dictator, Charlie Chaplin
"I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose." -- George Carlin
"I don't know what your generation's fascination is with documenting your every thought... but I can assure you, they're not all diamonds. 'Roman is having an OK day, and bought a Coke Zero at the gas station. Raise the roof.' Who gives a rat's ass?" -- Mr. Griffith, Easy A (2010)

COMEDIANS KRISTY CURRENTLY LIKES:

  • Andrew Dice Clay
  • Bill Hicks
  • Bill Maher
  • Bo Burnham
  • Bob Saget
  • Chris Rock
  • Dave Attell
  • Dave Chappelle
  • Gabriel Iglasias 
  • George Carlin
  • Jim Gaffigan
  • Jimmy Carr
  • Joe Rogan
  • John Pinette
  • Kevin Smith
  • Lewis Black
  • Louis CK
  • Margaret Cho
  • Mitch Hedberg
  • Richard Pryor
  • Robin Williams
  • Rowan Atkinson
  • Russell Peters
  • Stephen Lynch
  • Weird Al
  • Henry Cho
  • Joan Rivers